As I’m writing this I’m sitting in the waiting area of susans place. I decided after many failed attempts at calling to see if I had mail, I would hop on the train and go to the shelter.
Everyone that is staff is currently out for lunch, so I have an hour to kill while I wait. I may go to the deli and get a sandwich and a drink.
It would suck if I travelled all this way and I don’t have any mail. But I am expecting mail, so I rather just get this done and over with now even though I put in for my mail to be transfered to my new address, but it take 10-15 days for it to go into effect.
It’s so surreal being back in the shelter in the waiting area, which is meant for patients who have appointments at the medical clinic or for van requests to hra, social security, or the DMV.
The shelter is quiet. It’s not like I haven’t been here when the shelter wasn’t quiet, I had to see my psychiatrist by van request from the hotel. But now that I’ve moved out, this is my pervious address which is still on my current Identification.
Once everything is opened up again I’m going to the DMV to get a new identification.
Needless to say, I kind of miss susans place. It was home for a year and a half almost two years. I kind of miss the morning hustle in the cafeteria for breakfast and trying to find a place to sit down after breakfast in the living room.
I am starting forget what it feels like to have to get up in the morning and take my daughter to school or make breakfast for my son.
I have been in the hustle and bustle of the shelter that I have lost sense of what it feels like to be a mother. Even living alone. I just have to worry about myself. Its been two years and I am forgetting what it feels like but I won’t forget that I was a mother.